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Should I do this on my own?

Therapy will be much more successful for the two of you if you begin the process together, as a couple. 

Going it alone can encourage distance, instead of bring you together. The therapist only gets to see half the picture of the relationship, if you begin the process alone.

Should I choose based on gender?

If one of you would feel more comfortable talking with a therapist of a specific gender, then make that choice.

Therapeutically speaking, there's no reason to choose one gender over another.

Why not meet both Murray and Allie, and then make the choice? 

Does therapy really work?

As we are sure you can guess, therapy can work when the people involved are honest, committed, and working in partnership with the therapist to build new relationship skills.

In a recent study conducted by the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists, 97% of respondents said they received the help they needed, and 93% said they learned more effective tools for dealing with their issues.